Monday, June 27, 2011

FanficADD: So Many Stories, So Little Time

DISCLAIMER: This is in no way meant to be offensive to people who suffer from ADD/ADHD. If you are offended by this, or are easily offended, you should probably not read my blog...ever.

Lately I have found myself frustrated with Twi-fic. Some of my issues are:

1. I find myself starting a story then becoming bored and moving on, aka flouncing - the bad word - it's the "cunt" of fanfiction. Some of these stories have thousands of reviews and a year ago I probably would've loved them.

2. I have lost count of the WIPs that I'm reading. Sometimes I get behind in a story that I forgot to put on alert because I started reading it from a twitter link. Three months later I get excited when see a tweet about that fic updating and I think "Holy Motherfuck! I was reading that!"

3. I attempt to read all the stories my friends are reading - freaking impossible task.

4. I fail to review as often as I should, then I feel guilty about not reviewing enough.

5. I have no time to do all the things that keep my world functioning. I can't work full-time, clean my house, weed the garden, update the blog more than once a month, read, review, cook supper, host an Independence Day party for 60, etc. Fuck, I'm overwhelmed just thinking about it. I'd love to write a fic. I think I could do it. Riiiight, like I have time for that. When I get around to that, it will be about Bella and Edward falling in love in a nursing home and I'll be doing my own research.

6. Sometimes I just don't know what I want to read. High School fic? Nah. D/s? Nope. Manwhore E? Meh. Vamp fic? Probably not. Some plotlines are being rehashed too often. The stories start to meld together. I start to mix up characters - "Shit. I thought Alice was Edward's sister not Bella's cousin." Then when I finally find one that grabs me, I find out it was plagiarized word-for-word. And worse was a Harlequin romance.


My Posse h00rs and I have discussed that these are all symptoms of a condition we call FanficADD. When it hits me that usually means I should read a "real book" to clear my head. And thanks to my "real life" do-gooder friends that discovered I love to read, I now have a shitload of those on a TBR list as well. It never ends...
What are your symptoms of FanficADD? Come can tell me, I'm a doctor physician assistant.